Tip: use a regexp so the grep is not matching the line where is sits in ps list:
ps -aef | grep "[m]atchingexp" will match anything starting with letter ‘m’ and followed by ‘
atchingexp‘ , which will not be in the ps list as it will contain the  around the first letter of your match
grep -color is not producing color symbols if it detects that the output is not a terminal.
grep -color=auto is doing the same, that is not producing color symbols if it detects that the output is not a terminal.
The solution is to use “grep -color=always“ in the place that need it.
Do not put it in an alias of grep as it would break some code somewhere else. Color symbols are strings like “ESC[35m” and they will be inserted in the text.